| Monday, February 2, 2004, Chandigarh, India
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Grandparents in a new avataar
Ruchika M. Khanna
The grandmother of yesteryear loved to make chutneys and pickles, looked after the house and her grandchildren, while the son and daughter-in-law went out for work. Grandfather, mostly dressed in a kurta-pyjama, read the newspapers in the morning, got the family’s monthly rations, deposited the bills, and socialising for both meant a walk in the evening. But no longer.
The new age trouser-clad grandmoms love to party, play rummy and let their hair down at the weekly party in the club, get their facials and manicures done; and wear the latest shape in solitaires. Their husbands like to tee off at the Golf Club during the day and sip their Scotch on the rocks, while they flaunt their Park Avenue and Armani jackets.
The grandparents in the city have come of age. They are there for the grandparents day at their grand-children’s schools, as comfortably as they freak out during their annual or biannual vacation. Or go to the slimming clinic next door to shed the extra kilos.
Mrs Sheel Chopra(77) is now a proud great- grandmom. But neither age, nor her elevated familial status has stopped her from living life kingsize. The “jaan” of Thursday Ladies club as well as the city’s social circles, she is the perfect example of the new age grandmom. In fact, the woman is an inspiration, not only to her generation, but also to the younger generation, as she dispenses her roles at various cultural events organised in the club with elan.
“My children, their children and grandchildren are well settled. I fulfilled my own duties as a mother and it was after becoming a grandmother and seeing my children settle down in their own families that I rediscovered life, and now I enjoy every minute of it,” she says.
Similar thoughts are echoed by Mrs Savita Brijmohan, a grandmother of five. She had scripted and produced a successful Punjabi movie — Shaheed Udham Singh in 1976 — in the prime of her life, and now, she is again scripting a “Hinglish” movie based on human relationships.
A former lecturer at Government College For Boys, Ludhiana, this resident of Sector 7 here, says that education, economic independence, and the media blitzkrieg brought awareness and consciousness in today’s generation of grandparents.
“So, they jaunt around and party take good care of their personal appearances and assert themselves. Gone are the days when as soon as you became grandparents, you were relegated to the background. Today’s grandparents have evolved as individuals and give new meaning to their lives,” she says.
Today’s generation of grandparents emerge from the nuclear family set-up, where they have two or three children. Gone are the days when people would exhaust almost all their financial resources in marrying off their children. Now, most parents have discharged duties towards their children in their late 50’s and are ready to rediscover themselves thereafter.
Agrees Mr Subhash Nagpal, senior advocate and resident of Sector 8. “Nowadays, people are working for a longer span of time and are economically independent. More importantly today’s grandparents have more exposure, communicate better with their children and grandchildren, and are more educated - which explains their new status”.
His wife, Mrs Pratibha Nagpal, a faculty member at Panjab University, adds. “The fact that grandparents are becoming more communicative nowadays is also responsible for their changed role in the family and better lifestyles.”
Col Manjit Singh Khaira, a grandfather of five, says today’s grandparents have emerged as their grandchildren’s friends. He plays cricket, races around the house, takes interest in their school activities and socialising. “ With parents being busy in their own careers, grandparents, without losing out on their own lifestyle, have to fill in the gap. As a child, I maintained a distance from my father and grandfather. As a father, I was a strict disciplinarian with my children, but with the grandchildren I have turned their friend,” he says.
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